How to be the Favorite Grandparent
How to be the Favorite Grandparent
From Grandparents.com
#1: Show up.Relationships are like the lotto: you’ve gotta be in them to win them. That means face time, because absence has a price. If you haven’t seen as much of the grandchildren as you’d like to, you risk becoming the dreaded “other” grandparents – the less relevant grandparents.
#2: Be yourself.
Win the hearts and minds of your grandkids by being yourself – unabashedly and without apology. Use your judgment when to comes to more outlandish behavior, and lead with love every step of the way, but otherwise, make yourself irresistible by being authentic.
#3: Remember that it's not about you.
When there are children involved,they must come first. That means that all grown-ups – you included – need to act their ages. We understand it might not be easy to hold your tongue at first, but the high road has its privileges. It endears you to kids all around, including your adult children.
#4: Stay out of your own way.
It’s easy to trip all over yourself when you’re trying to get the kids to like you. You may be tempted to bend the rules a little, or even break them completely. Resist the temptation. Even though the way your kids are raising your grandkids may seem alien to you, remember that they almost certainly know the kids better than you do and want the best for them. Express your opinion when you can do so nicely, but be respectful and don’t arbitrarily change the house rules.
#5: Use your words.
Many modern parents impress upon their children that if they’re frustrated or angry, they need to use their words rather than acting out. It’s good advice for grown-ups, too, since it lays the groundwork for more meaningful relationships with children and with grandchildren. Expressing your feelings honestly and with compassion is one of the best ways to keep your family strong.
#6: Keep in mind that winning isn't everything.
Forget the tugs-of-war, whatever they involve - your parenting ideas vs. their parenting ideas, old school values vs. new school values, he said vs. she said. Why? Well, there’s a peace that comes with letting things go. And ultimately, everyone can be a winner when they recognize that winning isn’t everything.#7: Share your passions and what you've learned.We are meant to share the best of our life experience with the people that we love. When we do, magical things can and do happen. Sure, sometimes the kids ignore us and play video games. That’s okay. Keep pressing, because one day, they’ll thank you for it.
#8: Forget perfection.
Perfection isn’t possible and, even if it were, it probably wouldn’t be much fun. Instead, recognize the beauty that exists in your perfectly imperfect family. Disagree when you have to, but let love lead the way. Laugh together and sing together and dance in the rain.